Diverse

Pleaca sotul in alta camera cu mobilul in buzunar. Scoate mobilul si suna acasa pe fix. Sotia ridica receptorul. Sotul:
– Scumpo, te iubesc… Apoi inchide. Se intoarce inapoi si intreaba:
– Cine a sunat?
– Nimeni… o prietena..

A man bumps into a woman in a hotel lobby and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, ‘Ma’am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you’ll forgive me.’ She replies, ‘If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I’m in room 221..’

Un alpinist cazut in crapatura unui ghetar este gasit de o trupa de la crucea rosie si salvamont.
Astia striga de sus:
– Crucea rosie si salvamontul sunt aici!
Iar alpinistul din prapastie:
– Nu donez nimic!

– Am venit să cer mâna fiicei dvs!
– Cea mare sau cea mică?
– Cum, nu le are la fel?

Asemanarea dintre femei si calculatoare: Cu cat imbatranesc, cu atat devin mai ieftine…

– What’s your name young lady? – Mercedes, sir. – Any connection with Benz ? – Same price, sir.